When It's Not Puppy Love (At First Sight, Anyway)
You’re about to bring home your first foster, and you couldn’t be more excited! You can’t wait to get to know your foster dog’s personality and quirks, and most of all you can’t wait for all the fun play sessions she’ll have with your resident dog!
But when the big moment comes, you find that your normally very friendly dog is less than thrilled with your foster dog’s arrival. What’s going on?
When a resident dog isn’t getting along with a foster dog, it can be a stressful and confusing situation. What’s important to remember is that this doesn’t mean your dog isn’t dog-friendly or can’t be excited about having foster friends around! Rather, this usually means that your dog understandably needs a little bit more time to adjust to having another dog in their home.
Imagine you have another room for rent in your apartment. You would put up a listing and vet any prospective roommates. You may do a background check and interview, and you may even check references from previous roommates. Or even better, you may forgo a listing altogether and ask around to see if you can get firsthand recommendations from your friends or family. After all, this is your home, and it’s important that you share it with someone you trust and get along with, right?
Now imagine if you woke up one day and found a stranger moving into your empty room. You don’t know who they are, what they want, or why they’re in your home! You find out that your landlord chose someone to move into your spare room without consulting you. Even though you consider yourself to be a friendly and social person, you’re understandably alarmed that you now have to live with someone you know nothing about.
From your dog’s perspective, fostering is a lot more like the second scenario than the first. One day, your dog finds that he now has a new roommate who’s smelly and stressed from her trip to the city. Without a slow introduction, both dogs may understandably feel startled and threatened by the other dog. Like new roommates feeling each other out for the first time, there may be moments of nervousness, awkwardness, and even annoyance. With a slow introduction, though, you can allow your resident dog the time and space to adjust to this new roommate at his own pace.
A slow introduction starts with a parallel walk. During a parallel walk, you and a helper will walk both dogs together, but at a distance so that the dogs are unable to meet on leash. Here, on neutral ground, the dogs can work out their initial excitement or nerves before they ever actually interact. This way, when they are finally able to meet, they are calmer and already more comfortable with each other’s presence.
Once inside, how you arrange the dogs’ environment will also play a part in helping them adjust more easily. Anything a dog may be possessive over—such as toys, treats, or food—should be picked up from the floor and moved to a spot where the dogs can’t reach. Both dogs should have their individual food and water bowls in separate locations, and the food bowls should be picked up after mealtimes. While your pup may be used to taking his spot beside you on the couch, we recommend not allowing foster dogs on furniture as a simple and proactive way to provide structure and preempt resource guarding of spaces. It may be helpful to set up your foster’s crate in an area separate from where your resident dog is crated or typically spends his time.
We know that bringing home a foster is exciting and you’ll be itching to grab your phone to show your friends how cute the dogs are together, but it’s important to remember that separation is your friend! If either dog is showing signs of anxiety or stress, you can “crate and rotate” by taking turns putting one dog in their crate (or a blocked-off room) while letting the other roam. And even when the dogs are happily spending time together, it can still be a good idea to separate them for short periods of time so they can settle down, relax, and keep from getting overly excited or overwhelmed.
Lastly, it’s important to still spend quality time with both dogs! Feel free to take your resident pup for a solo walk to remind him that he’s still your favorite, or block out time to work with your foster dog on learning her commands. Even if the dogs are best friends from the start, they will still appreciate getting your undivided attention from time to time!
Fostering with a resident dog is fun and rewarding for both you and your dog. But while playtime and cuddle sessions may be the goal, the only way to get there is to make sure the introduction goes smoothly. Remember not to rush the dogs into interacting with each other, and don’t panic if they aren’t friends right off the bat. It may not always be puppy love at first sight, but with time, that #couplesgoals post you’re dreaming of can still become a reality!
